April 2022 – If there is something

Musk acquires Bullshit Mountain for $44 billion

Residents of Bullshit Mountain are fleeing in droves on news that tech multi-billionaire Elon Musk is purchasing the towering pile of crap that has fed and nurtured them for over a decade. Musk is reportedly paying $44 billion for the social media platform which anyone with an ounce of sense knows is about $43.95 billion too much.

The most prominent natives of Bullshit Mountain, who contribute nearly 90% of the excrement that flows from its rivers and streams out into the rest of society, are concerned about what might happen to their precious dung heap now that the Tesla CEO and free speech promoter is about to seize control.

Many prominent journalists, politicians, media and entertainment personalities have pledged to flee the platform in protest. Apparently, this nurturing land of inclusion and unquestioning acceptance that they have so lovingly crafted over the years is now in jeopardy of turning into a psychically abusive hell-hole.

Moreover, the political and intellectual elites who routinely mine truth from Bullshit Mountain are worried that the open inquiry and constructive debate they have so carefully cultivated will become irreparably harmed by Musk’s commitment to “free speech”.

As the old saying goes, “All politics and culture is downstream from Bullshit Mountain.” Judging by the frantic behavior of its inhabitants, our golden age of truth and discourse may be coming to an end.

NYT: That trip to the restroom could be your last

In a Monday New York Times piece entitled Is COVID More Dangerous Than Driving? How Scientists Are Parsing COVID Risks, author Benjamin Mueller attempts to bring some much needed perspective to the amount of risk Americans face from COVID in our new post-pandemalyptic landscape. The article concedes that doctors, scientists and public health officials haven’t been doing a proper job explaining risk to the rest of us dull-witted folks, so they’re going to lay down the facts in a way that even we can understand.

According to the piece, “an average unvaccinated person 65 and older is roughly as likely to die from an omicron infection as someone is to die from using heroin for 18 months.” I’ve long suspected that my ten month heroin addiction was mere child’s play compared to the ravages of Omicron, but finally I’ve had it confirmed for me by a real life health official. Thankfully, I’ve been vaccinated, so there is the peace of mind that comes with that protection, as well as the comfort of knowing I can ride the white horse for another seven months.

A University of Georgia mathematics professor was consulted to provide some overdue insight on how to understand percentages. The professor provided a useful example for overcoming her elderly mother-in-law’s difficulty grasping ten percent, explaining, “imagine if, once out of every 10 times she used the restroom in a given day, she died. ‘Oh, 10% is terrible,’ she recalled her mother-in-law saying.” No doubt everyone’s felt the cold hand of death on their shoulder from time to time when the urgent need to use the restroom arises. However, now the poor mother-in-law is trapped in a self-repeating cycle of alerting the grim reaper after every tenth flush of her toilet.

Another sobering reminder of risk showed “that an average 40-year-old vaccinated over six months ago faced roughly the same chance of being hospitalized after an infection as someone did of dying in a car crash in the course of 170 cross-country road trips.” Additionally, a “transplant recipient is twice as likely to die from COVID as someone is to die while scaling Mount Everest.” Well, when these high-falutin, ivory tower eggheads put it like that, the whole picture comes into high res focus. So, I guess you’re telling me that avoiding that second booster is akin to a daredevil motorcycle rider trying to jump 52 semis? Got it.

Overdosing heroin junkie, lavatory death chamber, Neal Cassady frequency road tripping fatality, Everest mountain climbing casualty: Whatever context they’re providing for establishing risk, it seems like the New York Times and their panel of expert consultants is basically just telling us to maintain the present course of being scared shitless all the time, which is pretty much the message they’ve been peddling all along.

When you’re broke, stoned and your only friends are FBI informants

If Americans thought the current epidemic of politically motivated kidnappings against government officials was going to end anytime soon, they can think again. Last Friday, Justice Department attorneys failed to secure guilty verdicts against any of the four men accused of plotting to kidnap Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer, who the alleged conspirators planned to either put on trial or abandon in a boat in the middle of Lake Michigan. Prosecutors and journalists fear this could send the wrong message to political extremists, signaling that it’s okay to snatch governors and subject them to public show trials or maritime abandonment. Elsewhere, average citizens are wondering when this country is finally going to get serious about halting the rash of abductions of senators, representatives, governors, mayors, cabinet holders and other high profile government officials.

Of the four accused in the alleged plot, two were found not guilty, while the jury deadlocked on the other two, including the alleged ringleader Adam Fox. People may remember that before rising to the status of one of the most feared domestic terrorists in the United States, Adam Fox was but a lowly, broke stoner who lived in the basement of a vacuum cleaner repair shop called the Vac Shack in Grand Rapids, Michigan. With nothing but his trusty bong to keep him company, Fox dreamed of one day becoming the leader of an effort to overthrow the State of Michigan, which would have the domino effect of bringing down the entire United States government. And he might have succeeded too, if not for a chance meeting with a guy by the name of Big Dan.

Despite Adam Fox’s indigent circumstances, Big Dan saw a lot of potential in the young man. Once he peered behind the poverty and pot smoke, Big Dan could tell that Fox was a crazy motherfucker, full of scary dreams and violent boasting, he just lacked proper guidance and direction. So Big Dan set about mentoring Fox, and with the help of his friends at the FBI, Big Dan worked tirelessly to make Adam Fox’s wildest, right-wing fantasies come true. You see, Big Dan was working as a sort of talent facilitator for the FBI, driving a company car and earning in excess of $50,000. As mentor, Big Dan offered Fox a free credit card with a $5000 limit. He secured for Fox a position with the Wolverine Watchmen, a right-wing militia group that Dan once belonged to, and Fox quickly rose through its ranks. Most importantly, though, Big Dan listened to Adam Fox, something few people had ever done. Because Adam Fox talked a lot of shit – a lot of scary, violent shit. But no one ever took him seriously until Big Dan and his FBI handlers.

Adam Fox, Big Dan and members of the Wolverine Watchmen held meet-ups, where Dan’s employer, the federal government, paid for transportation, food and lodging for all the participants. When the group’s own resident bomb maker, Barry Croft aka Tri-Cornered Hat Dude, failed to successfully detonate any of his homemade explosives, Big Dan and the FBI hooked the group up with a bomb guy. It seemed like everything was magically falling into place for this group of incompetent ne’er-do-wells.

Eventually, Big Dan received instructions to take it up a notch. On August 28, 2020, Special Agent Henrik Impola texted Big Dan with “a few goals for today.” Impola’s instructions included inviting the maximum number of participants to surveil the Michigan governor’s vacation home. “I default to getting as many other guys as possible so whatever works to maximize attendance,” Impola wrote. Big Dan pledged to make it happen, and so the plan was in place for FBI informant Big Dan to lead the team on a reconnaissance mission of the Michigan governor’s vacation home and surrounding area.

If you could point to one heroic figure in this whole affair, it would have to be FBI Special Agent Mary Jane. As it turns out, Adam Fox and another alleged conspirator called Barricade smoked marijuana five times during the infamous recon mission to Governor Witmer’s lake cottage. FBI photographs from that day show that the chief conspirator in one of the most daring domestic terrorism plots in United States history was so high that he used his hat to surveil the governor’s cottage from across the lake, rather than a pair of binoculars. Whatever preparation and intelligence gathering Adam Fox and the rest of the alleged conspirators attempted to undertake, it all seemed for naught as it wafted away on plumes of marijuana smoke and gross incompetence.

The nighttime recon mission didn’t fare much better. Here’s how Buzzfeed News tells the story:

“In the government’s telling, the most critical moment in the alleged plot took place late on Sept. 12, 2020, when Fox, Croft, and others piled into three trucks and headed out to conduct nighttime surveillance of Whitmer’s lakeside cottage.

“It was not a great success. For one thing, their companions that night included two confidential informants and two undercover agents. Some 10 additional FBI agents followed them en route, and stationary cameras mounted at strategic spots tracked their progress. For another, despite all the careful planning, the men failed to find Whitmer’s house because they had been given the wrong address, and heavy rains made it impossible for them to spot one another from across the lake as they had hoped to do.”

If not for his righteously impaired judgment, a stone free Adam Fox might have been able to ascertain he was being set up. “Whoa, that is some killer ganj, dude, because I’m seeing all kinds of super paranoid, fucked up shit. Suspicious vehicles, surveillance cameras, strange looking men lurking in the shadows. Holy shit!” You have to wonder if the FBI’s plan was to ensnare the would be terrorists during that recon mission, but the agency was unable to do so because the group lacked the sophistication to locate their target. Apparently, the group also lacked the sophistication to nail down a date for when they’d all be available to launch their expertly crafted plan.

Nevertheless, the feds dramatic takedown came days later when Big Dan, Fox and others traveled to Ypsilanti to meet with the FBI’s approved bomb maker, Red. With only $300 between them, the conspirators lacked the funds to obtain the $4000 device they sought, but they did have plenty of cash to go out for beer and hot wings after the meeting. That bit of frivolity would have to wait, however, as the conspirators were arrested without incident and have been held in jail ever since. That is until last Friday when Daniel Harris and Brandon Caserta were acquitted and set free.

The public can rest easy, though, two of the group’s leaders are still behind bars. Federal prosecutors have vowed to retry Fox and Croft. Perhaps, prosecutors could have brought this case in for a successful landing if they hadn’t left some of their all-star agents sitting on the bench. One of Big Dan’s handlers, Special Agent Jayson Chambers, didn’t testify because he had incorporated a private security firm and bragged about his credentials on the domestic terrorism front prior to the take down of the Apple Dumpling Gang. Another of Big Dan’s handlers, Special Agent Henrik Impola, was not called upon to testify because he had been accused of perjury in a prior case. Former FBI Special Agent Richard Trask, who also worked on the case, sat this one out because he faced charges stemming from an incident where he bounced his wife’s head off a nightstand when she failed to comply with his plan to join a Kalamazoo swingers party.

As for Adam Fox, he probably wishes he’d kept his mouth shut and taken his dreams in another direction, like pursuing that business idea of crafting custom hookahs and bongs out of old vacuum cleaner parts.

A figure on a bridge

Recent revelations from the Kegan Kline interrogation transcript obtained by the Murder Sheet podcast provide a glimpse into the sinister world of internet child predators. The lengthy police interview reveals how Kline, operating under the online profile anthony_shots, was able to connect with victims, obtain their trust and convince them to provide images, identities and private details of their lives. There is even a bizarre portion of the interview where interrogators and Kline discuss a situation where he and another profile seem to be catfishing one another. However, Kline admits to the police interrogator that he was aware at the time that he was probably interacting with someone more like himself rather than an underrage girl.

For much of the interview, interrogators confront Kline with evidence that he was almost certainly not the only person with access to the anthony_shots profile. Investigators zero in on Kegan Kline’s father, Tony Kline, as another individual who could have been logging into the account. Their interest in Tony Kline could make him a potential suspect in the Delphi murders as well as in a disturbing peeping tom incident referenced in the transcript. In both instances, the anthony_shots profile was in communication with the girls and had knowledge of their whereabouts prior to the incidents.

The networking of catfishers along with the potential for multiple individuals to have access to a single profile illustrates how these online predators share their revolting plunder with one another. It also begs the question, how widely disseminated were the images and interactions obtained by the anthony_shots profile? Could others, besides the Klines, have obtained information on the victims prior to the incidents discussed in the interrogation? What is the likelihood that a group could be sharing their twisted fantasies with one another, resulting in someone in their midst manifesting their vile yearnings in the real world?

Around the time investigators announced they were seeking information on the anthony_shots profile, in another part of the State of Indiana, a man named Trent Walker of Spencer County was revealed to have been the mastermind of an online group that preyed upon children. According to a November 17, 2021 Department of Justice press release, Walker “was sentenced to 210 years in federal prison for sexually exploiting two young children and sharing the images and videos he created.”

The description of Walker’s crimes is beyond horrifying. “Trent Walker, 36, began sexually abusing one of the victims when she was a toddler. The abuse continued over a six-year period and was sadistic in nature. During the sentencing hearing, Judge Richard L. Young, who presided, noted that Walker’s abuse of the child could fairly be described as torture. Walker also abused a six-year-old child for a several-month period. Both victims were in Walker’s care when he abused them.

“Walker created hundreds of images and videos of his sexual abuse of both victims, which he shared with an online group he ran. The group was dedicated to sadistically exploiting small children, some as young as infants. Walker served as the group’s moderator. He encouraged others to share sadistic abuse material, trained others how to conceal their identities online to avoid detection, and coached members of the group on how to abuse young children psychologically, physically, and sexually,” the press release states.

While Spencer County is hundreds of miles from Delphi, the case is instructive because it exposes not only the lone monster inhabiting a dark corner of an unsuspecting community, but also reveals with terrifying clarity how an individual bent on depravity and destruction is able to connect with, instruct and train a whole network of like-minded predators via the internet. The online group to which Trent Walker served as moderator was “dedicated to sadistically exploiting small children.” Walker “coached members of the group on how to abuse young children psychologically, physically, and sexually.” The idea of a lone individual offender engaging in this type of behavior is chilling enough. The reality that entire groups exist to promote and spread this evil is disturbing beyond comprehension.

It’s been five years since the Delphi murders. Five years ago a figure appeared on a bridge. His blurred likeness was captured on video for all to see, and his words were recorded for the world to hear. Yet no one, as far as we know, has been able to recognize and identify the individual. Adding to the mystery, no one knows definitively how he got out on that bridge or how he fled the scene once he had completed his cruel handiwork. He disappeared as mysteriously as he materialized, becoming a spirit in the wind, a demonic force evading capture. Five years ago, on an abandoned railroad bridge 70 feet above a frigid creek, two innocent children of the Delphi community crossed paths with a figure from nowhere. A sinister force partially molded in the depraved and disgusting hovels of the internet, emerging into the physical world to enact his sadistic nightmares. No doubt he’ll be found lurking there in his dark sanctuary, concealed in some dread corner of the web.

At urging of Pfizer CEO, FDA close to authorizing vaccine “bumps”

On the heels of authorizing a fourth dose of vaccine for the over 50 crowd, the FDA is considering adding vaccine “bumps” to the current regimen of periodic boosting.

When Pfizer CEO Albert Bourla approached the FDA about recommending another boost for individuals over 65, the regulatory body did him one better by expanding the pool to everyone over 50.

Sensing an opportunity to increase profits, Bourla has instructed researchers at the company to develop vaccine “bumps” to be administered periodically between boosts as a way of supplementing antibody protection.

“You know, it’s just like sometimes your antibodies start to feel a little low and your titer is down around 1:250, and you just need a little bump to maintain and get to feeling normal again. That’s where we’re at, bro,” Bourla told FDA officials. “So now when you go into a crowded restaurant and you’re worried about whether your antibody level is going to provide enough protection, you can slip into the restroom, give yourself a little bump of Pfizer vaccine and reemerge with the confidence that you can handle any situation.”

Needless to say, the FDA has been extremely impressed with Bourla’s proactive approach, planning to fasttrack the approval of vaccine bumps without requiring efficacy trials.

Critics worry that self-administered vaccine jabs could be unnecessary and lead to unintended health consequences. Bourla dismisses the concern. “The public has this notion that I’m some kind of pusher man, that I like sticking needles in people’s arms. Do I look like a common drug peddler? Get real, man.”

Another layer of darkness descends over Delphi case

Anyone who has paid much attention to the Delphi case the last five years knows the darkness runs pretty deep in parts of rural Indiana. Every now and then some act of unspeakable depravity is brought into the light, causing Delphi investigation onlookers to speculate whether the latest perpetrator could be the one who murdered 13-year-old Abigail Williams and 14-year-old Liberty German on February 13, 2017.

In April of last year, James Brian Chadwell lured a young girl into his home in Lafayette, brutalized her and almost certainly would have killed her if not for the swift action of family and law enforcement to locate the girl and save her from the vicious assault. Chadwell was sentenced to 90 years in prison for child molesting and attempted murder of the nine-year-old girl.

At the time, Chadwell seemed like a pretty solid suspect for the Delphi murders. After all, how many child murderers could there be living within a 20 mile radius of Delphi? Perhaps more than one, as it seems Chadwell is probably not responsible for the Delphi killings.

Then, last December, another potential child predator was revealed by Indiana State Police. Investigators issued a press release seeking any information regarding the online profile anthony_shots. Within hours it was discovered that this profile belonged to a man named Kegan Anthony Kline of Peru, Indiana, another town near Delphi.

The news again ignited speculation that this individual might have some involvement with the Delphi homicides. Kline was questioned by investigators in the weeks following the murders and admitted to collecting pornograpic images of underage girls using the anthony_shots profile. Arrested in 2020, Kline is currently sitting in jail awaiting trial on multiple counts of child exploitation, possession of child pornography, child soliscitation and obstruction of justice.

Last week, the true crime podcast, The Murder Sheet, made available the transcript of a 2020 police interrogation of Kegan Anthony Kline. While illuminating previously unknown facts and circumstances surrounding the crime, revelations from the interrogation simultaneously cast another layer of dread and darkness over a case that was already quite dark to begin with.

The Kline police interview reveals an individual obsessed with obtaining and disseminating sexually explicit images of underrage victims. Under the guise of anthony_shots, an often shirtless young male with model good looks, Kline was able to insert himself into the lives of Liberty German and some of her peers. In one instance, Kline as anthony_shots is exchanging messages with Liberty German while she is attending a slumber party. Ensconced in the confines of his disgusting hovel, Kline is virtually in the room with these middle school girls who believe him to be a cute boy with a Lamborghini.

In another instance, anthony_shots was in communication with a girl whose family was acquainted with the Kline family. This girl made arrangements to meet up with anthony_shots at her house after school before her parents arrived home from work. On the appointed day, when the girl arrived home from school, she discovered a man in a ski mask peering inside her bedroom window.

In one of the most damning revelations of the interrogation, investigators discovered that anthony_shots was in communication with Liberty German on the morning of the murders. Later, the profile communicated with Liberty’s friend, saying that he was supposed to meet Liberty the day of the murders.

Throughout the interview, investigators make it clear that they believe Kegan Kline is not the only individual with access to the anthony_shots profile. They confront Kline with a lot of evidence showing that his father, Tony Kline, may have been accessing the account as well. In fact, whether it was just an interrogation technique or detectives really believe it, interviewers admit to Kegan Kline that they don’t think he killed the two girls and seem to be pressing him to give up his dad.

Tony Kline, as we learn in subsequent Murder Sheet podcasts, is an unpredictable and extremely sadistic character capable of extreme violence at the most benign trigger. His own step-children relate stories of Tony brutalizing the family over innocent transgressions. It is easy to see why investigators seem to be focusing on him, and who knows what other evidence they have that may point to the elder Kline.

Still, though, Tony Kline has not been arrested, and you have to wonder if there are others who may have had access to the anthony_shots social media account. Investigators have said that the arrest of Kegan Kline has led to the largest child porography investigation in the state’s history. There is mention by interviewers that Kline had a Dropbox account that may have been accessible by some of his other deviant acquaintances on the internet. Could there be others in this twisted milieu who had access to the images and messages obtained by the anthony_shots profile? No doubt, investigators are exploring all these angles, and hopefully there will soon be an arrest.

In the meantime, it just seems like social media apps like Instagram and Snapchat are perfectly fitted for those strangers your parents warned you never to talk to. These apps readily connect the innocent, trusting and unsuspecting to wolves hiding behind an attractive smiling face and a cool car, who then can invade a private space like a sleepover or a family home in a way that never could have been previously imagined. And once the wolf is let inside, the damage is only limited by its appetite for depravity.