The Onion editor calls J. K. Rowling “a billionaire with a penchant for spreading misery”

The irony runs deep and voluminous when The Onion senior managing editor Jordan LaFlure sits down for a chat with Buzzfeed.  In the interview, LaFlure describes widely beloved and massively successful author J.K. Rowling as “a billionaire with a penchant for spreading misery.”  It is quick-witted comments like these that cause Onion readers to nearly fall out of their chairs laughing.  Having sold more than 600 million books worldwide, the sheer scale of misery J.K. Rowling has inflicted on the planet boggles the mind, and is worthy of a hearty chortle.  LMFAO at the notion of all the suffering souls plunking down $7.7 billion at the box office to enthusiastically endure the senseless agony of sitting through Harry Potter on the big screen.  Oh, all the humanity!  Why just last year, Harry Potter books had sales of 123 million British pounds in the first six months alone.  I don’t know how much misery that equates to in American dollars, but it sounds like an awful lot.  By the way, that’s 22 percent more misery than the previous year. 

The Onion is seeking to mine comedy gold by portraying J.K. Rowling as a transphobe.  LaFlure is onto something there as the possibilities for irony seem nearly limitless.  Portraying J.K. Rowling as a transphobe would be like depicting Mr. Rogers as a neonazi.  A recent example of this new approach features a mock interview between The Onion editors and Rowling.  Because Rowling has never made an anti-trans comment in her life, The Onion satirically depicts her saying of trans-folk, “I was advocating for their total annihilation.”  Boundless hilarity erupts on the pages of The Onion as it attempts to portray a woman who escaped an abusive marriage and went on to become one of the most successful authors in history, a woman who has donated hundreds of millions of dollars to charity and earned the adoration of a billion fans as a merchant of misery.

Indeed, LaFlure and his colleagues at The Onion appear to be ushering in a new knee-slapping, golden age of comedy satire.  Attacking a much beloved children’s author with egregious and untrue accusations shielded in satire is just the sort of side-splitting comedy relief the world has been clamoring for. 

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