Celebrity owners left with only ‘seeds and stems’ after pot shop pilfered

It was a rude wake and bake for Bill Maher and Woody Harrelson after their Hollywood pot shop was the target of a smash-and-grab robbery over the weekend.  

Witnesses say the pair arrived Saturday morning at The Woods WeHo to discover the shop had been looted and only a handful of seeds and stems had been left behind by the robbers.

Harrelson was heard to exclaim, “I think I feel something,” as the pair puffed away on what little cannabis remains could be scavenged from the carpet and between couch cushions. 

The co-owners then attempted to brew some tea from the leftover seeds and stems.  However, it is unclear if the pair were able to “catch a buzz.”       

Surveillance video of the incident shows a vehicle struggling to parallel park moments before the robbers emerged from a smoke-filled SUV and staggered to the door.

According to KTLA5, “The video shows them shattering a glass window, rushing into the store, filling bags with merchandise and then fleeing within seconds.”

However, the video later shows the trio fleeing on foot after they realized they’d inadvertently locked the keys in the vehicle.

Local man backs out of Met Gala invite at last minute

City resident, Ed Brush, took to his favorite social media app, MySpace, today to explain his last minute decision to back out of Monday night’s Met Gala extravaganza.

“It is with great sadness and a heavy heart that I was unable to attend this year’s Met Gala event at New York’s famed Metropolitan Museum of Art.  Ultimately, a number of considerations led to this very difficult decision.

“Firstly, I did not have time to make it to J.C. Penney to pick up my suit for the event.  Organizers suggested I’d be fine wearing nothing more than a tasteful blazer.  When I explained that I can’t get any of my old blazers to button anymore, they suggested I accessorize with a strategically worn white tube sock.  When I realized that all my tube socks have holes and the elastic is worn out, I decided to ditch that idea,” Brush said.

Having settled on a blue blazer over a flesh colored bodysuit, Brush next set about arranging transportation to the event.

“The second thing that happened was I learned that I would not be able to catch a ride on AOC’s Fighting Oligarchy tour jet, and that if I wanted to rub elbows with the champagne socialists, I’d have to ride coach.  Being a man of the people, I had no problem travelling coach.  However, apparently wearing a flesh colored bodysuit through the airport tends to attract the attention of TSA, and they detained me for questioning.  Strangely enough, telling them who I was and where I was going failed to hasten the proceedings.

“Anyway, sorry AOC, Kamala, Alex, Whoopi, Rihanna, Nicole, Lisa, I’ll have to catch up to you next year,” Brush concluded his message.