Ranking dead last in net migration, California is watching its citizens flee the state in droves. The dream of starting a new life in a land of limitless opportunity seems to have died out completely, and long-time residents are singing a different tune from the hopeful songs of yesteryear.
“Fifty years ago, everybody was ‘Going to California’ and ‘California Dreaming,’” said an old hippie packing for Colorado. “Today it seems like the dream is over. Californians have gone from knowing how to party and Californicating to getting the hell out. Anyway, I wrote a little song about it called ‘Leaving California.’” At that the dusty old hippie picked up his beat up six-string and sang:
Fifty years with a woman unwell
Spent my dough and dragged me through hell
Made up my mind to set myself free
Leaving California after hip replacement and a colonoscopy
Someone told me there’s woman out there
With most of her teeth and curlers in her hair
Took my chances on a mobility scooter
It’s a low emission, non-polluter
A homeless man poops on the sidewalk at dawn
A movie producer tells him get off my lawn
People in the street start to riot and shake
Hippies load their buses for the Lone Star State
Looks like a cop on patrol
Got a punch in the nose and it started to flow
I think I should be going
To seek the silver-haired queen of the rain
You know she played her tambourine and sang, la la la la
Shuffling through the mists of the dawn
Trying to find a gal who can still get along
Ride a chairlift on a stairway of dreams
Telling myself Florida’s not as far, far, far as it seems
If there is something 