United States officials confirmed Monday that the Chinese spy balloon which terrorized much of the country over the weekend was after America’s closely guarded tater tot technology.
Experts say this is just the latest example of the Chinese attempting to expropriate American intellectual property.
Developed during the cold war, the process for manufacturing tater tots has been a closely guarded national secret ever since their invention in 1953. No other country in the world is capable of fabricating the unique extruded potato cylinders.
Countries like Israel, Russia and China have all claimed to be in possession of tater tot technology, but so far have been unable to produce a viable tater tot. Most of the “tots” produced by these nations appear to more closely resemble irregularly shaped “bites.”
U.S. officials have confirmed that the Chinese spy balloon crossed into American airspace from Canada over Idaho. Officials are claiming that the balloon was utilizing ground penetrating radar to learn more about our nation’s vast underground tater tot manufacturing capabilities.
The manufacture of tater tots is a highly specialized process. Located beneath vast potato fields, the Idaho facility sucks the potatoes from below into its underground operation, working around the need to transport potatoes into the factory and possibly reveal its whereabouts.
American officials are also exploring the possibility that the Chinese may have been aided by spies working in Canada. “The Canadians would love nothing more than tater tot technology to fall into the hands of the Chinese,” said an unnamed Pentagon source.