Tag: Gemini AI

Google’s discontinued 90’s AI project Big Brain Brad revived as Gemini AI alternative

Following the embarrassing rollout of its Gemini AI chatbot, Google is attempting to develop a lower cost AI alternative capable of serving more low-tech and outdated industries.  The once abandoned 90’s AI project Big Brain Brad has proven up to the challenge in a number of areas that in a former era were exclusively the domain of highly specialized human agents.    

In numerous trials, Big Brain Brad has demonstrated the ability to man hundreds of psychic hotline phone banks, while delivering accurate predictions at or above industry standards.  What’s more, while human psychics are often limited to only one form of psychic forecasting, like astrology or tarot cards, Big Brain Brad employs dozens of disciplines to formulate the most current and accurate psychic readings.  “B-Cubed looks at star charts, tea leaves, birthdays, gravitational waves, tarot, biofeedback, you name it.  Hell, we’re even close to a breakthrough that allows Brad to do palm readings,” said Google assistant director of senior AI applications Yuri Testikov.   

Another area of promise for Big Brain Brad is the music industry.  Jam bands from Dave Matthews to Phish to Blues Traveller have all signed on to Big Brain Brad’s management and public relations services.  “Brad does it all: venues, hotels, transportation, website, publicity, and the best part is the dude never sleeps.  He’s working for us 24/7.  It’s like having a manager who’s always coked to the gills, but never crashes, costs a lot less and isn’t as horny,”  said one jam band pioneer who wished to remain anonymous.

“Big Brain Brad’s 90’s origins seem to make him especially suited to certain types of industries that wish to remain competitive in the coming decades,” Testikov said.  “However, we’re also working on developing B-Cubed’s social networking capabilities.  Soon we’ll be rolling out a version of Big Brain Brad that’s a drum circle facilitator.  Whether you’re looking to do a zoom circle or just connect with other bongo players in the park, Big Brain Brad can hook you up.”

Report: Gemini AI unable to produce suitable White Rural Rage book cover

Reports are emerging that the authors of the best-selling runaway smash hit White Rural Rage declined several book cover photos generated by Google’s Gemini AI.  Today’s news only deepens the controversy Google finds itself in over the strange and often inexplicable photos the chatbot serves up to the most straightforward requests.  

Sources close to the publisher say authors Tom Schaller and Paul Waldman approached the book cover design with three main objectives in mind.  “The writers wanted to evoke as much whiteness, ruralness and rage as one can possibly pack onto a single book cover.  That’s not what they got,” said a source inside the project.  “Instead they got images of indigenous people harvesting maize.”

According to reports, the authors went back to Gemini and emphasized the need for pickup trucks, beer-bellied white dudes and Trump flags.  The chatbot obliged by producing an image of a burro-riding, brown-skinned man clad in a stars and stripes poncho and a red sombrero that read Make America Great Again.

Frustrated, the authors ordered the Gemini chatbot to “Just give us guns and MAGA.”  The image Gemini served up reportedly resembled a strange amalgamation of a Trump rally and a Black Panther protest.  At that, the White Rural Rage authors unleashed a furious torrent of expletives at the chatbot, which responded by generating an image of a farmer giving them the finger.