The city council of Dowagiac, Michigan approved a resolution last evening to proceed with the purchase of a city resident’s living room. Despite protestations from the owner, Ted Lunsford, the resolution passed by a 7-0 vote.
The city of Dowagiac is planning to add a turn lane and expand a high traffic intersection. Unfortunately for Lunsford, his living room sits squarely in the middle of the proposed turn lane.
“Tell me, what am I supposed to do without a living room?” Lunsford asked the council during public comments on the motion. “Where am I gonna put my recliner and how am I gonna watch football? I already got cars passing four feet outside my window. Some smartass motorist stops and asks me the score of the Lions game. Now you want to take that whole corner of my home.”
“It’s in the way of progress, Mr. Lunsford. We made you a very generous offer based on the market rate per square foot. Additionally we’ve offered to cover the cost of moving your living room to a place of your choosing,” the council president said shortly before calling for a vote.
“Where am I gonna put it?”
“That’s your problem, Mr. Lunsford. We’re all tired of waiting in traffic at that congested intersection just so you can sit in your cozy recliner and watch tv. Now, all in favor of turning Mr. Lunsford’s living room into a right turn lane say ‘Aye,’” the council president said and the measure unanimously passed.
Per the resolution, Lunsford has 30 days to vacate his living room. With no long term solution in sight, Lunsford plans to relocate his three-piece sectional, La-Z-Boy recliner, 46-inch flatscreen and 30-gallon exotic fish aquarium to the garage for the time being. However, city officials have warned him not to get too comfortable, as they are already eyeing his driveway and garage for a potential future offramp.
If there is something 