Scientists again detect emissions from Uranus

Barely a year has passed since scientists detected gas leaking out of Uranus.  Unable to confidently pin down the source of the gas at the time, scientists mostly took a whoever smelt it dealt it approach to the puzzling discovery.  Well, now it seems the noxious planet is at it again, only this time Uranus appears to be emitting x-rays.  It still isn’t known if the lazy little world which lies on its side all day is simply reflecting emissions from the sun or is producing the emissions itself.

“I guess there’s only one way to get to the bottom of this.  We need to send some equipment up there to probe Uranus.  A properly equipped Uranal probe could provide the answer regarding whether the emissions originate from elsewhere, or if their occurrence is due to some astral-intestinal malady?” says Grant Snyder of NASA’s Chandra X-ray Observatory.   

However, most scientists consider probing Uranus too hands-on and costly, preferring to monitor the planet’s activity from afar.  

“I think more compassion is in order.” says Steven Smeltz, of New Mexico State University.  “We need to study its daily habits and develop a more comprehensive understanding of Uranus.  Only after extensive observation should we even consider ordering a scope or collecting a sample.  All planets produce emissions.  It’s totally natural.  However, for some reason, everybody looks to Uranus whenever a new discharge is detected.  Everybody wants to know, what’s up with Uranus?  Hey, check out Uranus.  Enough with the wisecracks, people.  Stop talking out your ass and give Uranus a break.”