G7 leaders gather to record rousing rendition of All You Need Is Doom

Leaders of the Group of Seven Industrialized nations have been cranking out hit after hit since coming together in Brussels this week.  On Thursday, they signaled their unity by assembling for a photo-op and spontaneously bursting into an impromptu performance of their international smash hit All You Need Is Doom.

Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was the first to seize the microphone and issue a stern warning to humanity: 

“There’s nothing you can say that can’t be unsaid,

Nothing you can spend that can’t be unspent,

Listen to us and you can learn how to be you in time,

It’s easy.”

Addressing a group of reporters at a news conference in Brussels, Biden delivered a stirring address to the people of all nations:  “It’s going to be real.  The price of the sanctions is not just imposed upon Russia. It’s imposed upon an awful lot of countries as well, including European countries and our country as well.”

Glimpsing the sacrifice world leaders were willing to make, the people of the world at once sensed their duty to all go hungry together.  Then Biden kicked a hole in the speaker, grabbed the mic and sang:

“No one you can lead that can’t be unled,

No one you can feed that can’t be unfed,

Nothing you can do but you can play the game by the rules,

It’s easy.”

Then the rest of the Group of Seven joined Biden for the chorus, singing, “All you need is doom,” as they closed out the meeting.

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